Days 29-31: Yosemite National Park - What would you do if instructed to "Boogie on Down?"

Emmie here to give you an overview of our three day trip to Yosemite.

I like maps

I am getting a little bit bored of the standard blog format (and my brain almost imploded from lack of stimulation on the long drive from San Mateo to Santa Barbara), so I've decided to chronicle our adventure in Yosemite using an acrostic. In preparation for my post, I looked up some common acrostics and the first one that popped up in the google search was the 3rd grade favorite:

My (Mercury) Very (Venus) Excellent (Earth) Mother (Mars) Just (Jupiter) Served (Saturn) Us (Uranus) Nine (Neptune) Pizzas (Pluto)

...which in light of the recent (2006) demotion of Pluto from the status of a planet to a dwarf planet, has been officially changed to My Very Excellent Mother Just Served Us Nachos...which made me feel old. Also, google informs me that the dutch national anthem is an acrostic that spells out WILLEM VAN NASSOV. Weird. I wonder if Marten knows about that (see the Seattle post).  

An Acrostic to Yosemite by Mary Eva Calland

Yearning to conquer the crest of half dome we travel hours in the California sun

Oh Heck, Indian poker, and an awkward encounters crescendo to whitewater fun

Safety talks precede a raucous journey down the Merced River and when done

Exhaustion consumes us on our journey to a distant campsite and dinner of meatballs a la bun

Mirror Lake's unrivaled beauty leads us to ponder the plot of Homeward Bound

In the majestic mist of Yellowstone valley choruses of "a permit required to climb" resound

Torrential downpours, sandbar camping, and an upside-down rain cover confound

Evacuation is our only option; the pavement we pound

Yearning to conquer the crest of half dome we travel hours in the California sun...

We leave San Francisco in mid-afternoon and head east toward Yosemite. According to our overly detailed itinerary, it should take approximately four hours to arrive there but it felt like four years following highway 120. I was driving and both Katie and Parm fell asleep, and it should be mentioned that the "cooler smell" was permeating the car.

BORING! Probably blasting some T-Pain

By way of explanation, we at one point had chai tea in our cooler, which made everything smell disgusting. We have obviously removed the chai tea now, but it's as if the chai mixed with ass and has nested in the cooler fibers. We've been quoting the car scene in the movie The Sweetest Thing where Christina Applegate says with a straight face, "Oh it must be the ass I left in the back" whenever possible. It's to the point where if anyone plans to open the cooler, it is protocol to give the entire car a 10 second verbal warning so that the other passengers can opt to hold their breath or open the nearest window. So yeah, it was a long drive.

Because campgrounds in Yosemite fill months in advance, we choose Pine Mountain Lake campground about 20 minutes outside the park. We pitched our tent and made dinner, mostly eating leftovers from brunch and heating up some tomato soup.

Peaches and blueberry Havarti from Salem!

The "chef" at work. Chef is in quotations because I was reheating leftovers. Airing out the cooler too...

Parm taking a brief respite after setting up the "Half Dome" a.k.a. our tent. We were hoping to climb the actual half dome in Yosemite before we left that week.

We also discuss a tentative plan to head into the park early tomorrow to grab a walk up campsite and then go white water rafting when...

Oh Heck, Indian poker, and an awkward encounter crescendo to whitewater fun

we are visited by three young gentleman about our age, Stephen, Chris (brothers) and Brian (cousin) who are camping two sites away with a larger group mostly consisting of men about our fathers age. We do brief introductions and discover that they are dudes from Laguna beach and are here for a whitewater rafting trip with their dads and their dads' friends.

Katie and Brian. These guys actually say "gnarly" by the way.

I really had to resist the urge to ask them if they knew LC or Kristin Cavallari (we later find out one of them was on Parental Control!!). They also invite us to go rafting with them in the morning since three of the people in their party headed home early or died on the river, depending on who you talk to. We agree rafting would be fun, and exchange furtive glances, wondering if going on dangerous rafting trips with strange men we've never met violates the strict "no bears, no boys" policy set forth by our fathers prior to the trip.

They leave us to eat our dinner, but come back an hour or two later with an additional camper named Todd (more on him later) as well as some wine and beer. We are in the middle of a card game entitled "Oh Heck" which we attempt to teach them, but as they are already a few drinks deep (and we are not far behind) it quickly devolves into a rudimentary game of Indian Poker and general taunting.

Stephen, Chris, and me. Undoubtedly someone is trash talking as that was the premise (and only rule) of the game. "Your card really sucks!" and so on.

Wine smiles :)

Stephen also reveals that he is distantly related to Alanis Morissette. Isn't that ironic? Don't you think? It's like raiiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn... We are skeptical of and incredibly excited by this factoid.

The next morning Brian comes over to tell us that if we're coming rafting we should introduce ourselves to the rest of the party. We mosey to their campsite for a slightly awkward round of intros. We head back to our car to pack up and change for rafting and...we feel awkward. Well, we ask ourselves, are we ready to be "those random girls the boys brought on the family rafting trip that one summer" for many Christmases and Thanksgivings to come? Yes we are.

And we followed the rafts into Yosemite Valley...we were sent into hysterics when we noticed one of the trucks had a bumper sticker that read "I have the power to satisfy"

Safety talks precede our first journey down the Merced River and when done

We follow our friends into Yosemite Valley, where most of the infrastructure is, and get our first glimpses of Bridal Veil falls, Yosemite Falls, El Capitan, and the Half Dome. GORGE! No pun intended. We are excited to come back and take some sweet pictures, but onto the Merced River for some rafting. Though the Merced runs through the Yosemite, technically we will be rafting just outside of the park. After donning some really sexy wetsuits, we sit down on the rocks by the raft launch and Todd, nicknamed the river god, gives us a safety speech. At the end, he mentions that since he is the guide of our boat (the captain and person who steers), we need to know his commands.

Boog!- paddle once, so boog! boog! boog! means paddle three times

Boogie on down- paddle till I say stop

Whoop!- back paddle, we're going too fast or need to turn quickly

Roscoe- to the right

Louie- to the left

And off we go! I will let the pictures speak for themselves.

Team Wisconsin we were called. Note the "W" with the paddles

Action shot

Brian and me reenacting how we feel when we hit a "gnarly" hole (a.k.a. rapid)

Katie and Todd the River God. BOOG BOOG!

Three chicks and a raft. Note my hat. Here we go Steelers!

Notables

• The trip lasted about three and a half hours but it felt like half an hour because it was so fun! Oh and lunch on the river bank was BOMB. Check out this spread:

Me and the dads

• We found out part way through the trip that our guide, Todd, was the captain of the U.S. Whitewater team for 9 years, and that one of the other men who organized the trip, Kirby, is a nationally recognized white water rafter and paid to instruct other guides. So these guys are super legit.
• We mostly traversed class III and a few class IV rapids. You can't tell from these pictures but we air jordaned (that's a verb now) several times and surfed some of the rapids.
• Katie and I were both knocked off the boat. It was awesome. The water was really cold but not at dangerous temperatures. Glad for the stylish wetsuit.
• Parm and I, who were in the front and supposedly setting the pace, really suck at counting "BOOGS!"
• We were deemed the "giggly boat" since there was only one other girl on the trip, and we were shrieking and laughing like we were on a roller coaster. Hey, it was a good time! Doesn't make us any less hardcore.

Thanks Brian, Stephen, Chris, Dean, Sara, Larry, Todd, Kirby, Tim, Justin and crew! Sara dropped us off at our car and we headed out of the park to find an open campsite for the evening.

Exhaustion consumes us on our journey to a distant campsite and dinner of meatballs a la bun

Maybe it was all the glasses of wine we had the night before coupled with a day of travel, sun, and rafting, but we were wrecked. Katie took over as driver on the way out of the park because Parm was practically falling asleep at the wheel.We finally find an open campground west of Yosemite off of 120, pitch the tent, and decide that we are way too exhausted to cook anything. So we hit the nearest restaurant about 10 miles away. If you don't believe me that we were exhausted, take a look at this candid picture of Parm (she's going to kill me for posting this, but it's worth it).

Complete despair

But food cures all ills...

Complete elation at the arrival of her meatball sub

We go to bed before 10, and resolve to get up at 6AM to drive into Yosemite to get in line for a walk up campground so that we don't have to commute in and out of the park up to 45 minutes each way.

We successfully wake up the next morning (although we yell at each other several times out of sheer exhaustion) but once we hit the road, we are stuck behind a huge RV with the name Lance scrawled across the back. Lance is going 5-10 under the speed limit and refuses to pull over at any turn outs. We collectively decide that if we don't get a camping spot because of this RV, then we are hunting this guy down, and sleeping in the back of his vehicle tonight.


We arrive at Campground 4 at about 7:05 and wait in line for over an hour to get a campspot. The ranger has tickets to camp for 44 individuals and we are number...45. No joke. Katie and I seriously almost cried. Parm was in the car sleeping and then getting coffee. But we did meet a cute wilderness ranger/firefighter our age (Ranger Dan) in line. Oh haey firefighter! Mama let you date? (That was for you Pete). Deflated, we park by the Yosemite lodge in preparation for our hike that day and see LANCE in the parking lot! We did not sleep in the back, but we did kick his tires.

Mirror Lake's unrivaled beauty leads us to ponder the plot of Homeward Bound

After grabbing a quick breakfast at Yosemite lodge, we stop by Yosemite falls for a photo op.

Yosemite Falls- kind of looks like a fake Hollywood backdrop but it's real!

And this is the view from the middle of Yosemite valley- just like the show Planet Earth

Then we hop the free shuttle over to stop number 19 and begin a hike of Mirror Lake-which we learn is a misnomer. It's really just a reflection pool that appears in spring due to run off from the mountains and reflects the image of Half Dome (the largest and most famous rock formation in Yellowstone). We hike about a mile and a half before we hit mirror lake. It's a really fantastic view.

HALF DOME!

We decide that this view is amazing so we are going to eat some lunch in the shade. And then Parm decided to write postcards. And then I fell asleep against a rock (life of the party) while Katie took about 8 bajillion pictures with her new camera. So our hike was a little delayed, but it was very relaxing.

Parm, likely writing a Jimmy Fallon-esque thank you note."Thank you children who drastically overestimate the amount of space on homemade cards, for always wishing your parents a HAPPY BIRTHdaymomanddad."

I had a lunchable for the first time in about 20 years. Capri Suns taste the same BTW.

We found a field full of rock towers to show other hikers had been there. Check out Katie's towers (if you know what I mean!)

Then we took off down the rest of the trail which had large boulders all around it from the granite formations surrounding the landscape. There were a lot of warnings about mountain lions and it looked just like the mountain lion scene in homeward bound. In case you have forgotten about Homeward Bound (I just lost respect for you) here is the clip http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2YTOHBigxog. Part of the trail was closed down due to rockslides, but Katie snuck on the other side to take some pictures.

Note Katie in the distance. Again, we do what we want. Also it should be noted the piece of paper on the sign read "Beware of death slabs" I don't know what a death slab is, but it sounds menacing.

It's in the majestic mist of Yellowstone valley that choruses of "a permit is required to climb" resound

When our hike was finished we did some brief exploration of the valley and then headed down 140 southwest of the park to try our luck in that area for camping. We struck out at two places but the elderly gentleman running the second campground pointed across the street to a plot of land at the base of the mountains where the local snow plowers keep sand during the summer and said that the rangers won't ticket us for camping there. "Just hope those big rocks stay put" he finished, and gave us a big wink.

Home sweet home next to the pile of sand

It's free we figure, so we setup camp like the wind. Our rain cover was still wet from the night before so  we decide to put the rain cover on the tent but inside out to give it a chance to dry. We drove back to the park for three important stops before bed.

1. The visitors center to talk to a ranger about climbing half dome. They succinctly inform us that not only do you need a permit to climb halfdome as of this year and they are sold out, but that it is supposed to thunder and lighting tomorrow which makes hiking to the top incredibly unsafe. You may as well have told a 3-year-old there is no Santa Claus. Sadface.

2. Dinner- we drown our sorrows in some real coke and cheese pizza in Yosemite village.

3. A ranger talk in the lower pines area about wildlife in the park. We missed the beginning, but the speaker was a super knowledgeable evolutionary biologist. Our favorite factoid he shared is that they rarely see mountain lions in the park, but about five years ago there were two lions hanging out inYosemite valley that were exhibiting stalking behavior toward school children visiting on field trips. They ended up having to shoot the lions-but not before a specialist made an assessment, the park board voted, and the superintendent of parks signed off on the decision.

Pic of the visitors center, our new hang out

Torrential downpours, illegal sandbar camping, and an upside-down rain cover confound...

Around 9:30 PM we start the drive back to our makeshift campground and it begins to pour buckets and buckets of rain. We sit in our car for about 20 minutes, afraid to even look in the tent. After losing a game of rock paper scissors (you cheat McGuckin!) I run out to check the status.

Pro: The tent is only wet in a few spots since we did have the rain cover on and a tarp underneath... and our tent is pretty bomb.

Fail: Since we put the rain flap on upside-down, water has seeped through the vents and is in puddles by our head.

It lighting and thundered most of the night, there were ever encroaching puddles and I woke up at 2AM pondering my mortality as lightning flashed. "Katie...Parm...I really don't want to die in a rockslide!" I whisper around 2AM, but apparently the thought of imminent death via rockslide was not enough motivation to leave the tent in the rain.

We lived to see the morning, packing the tent in plastic bags. It was still raining and the temperature had dropped about 10-15 degrees. We had planned to do a full day hike either to Glacier Point or the Upper falls and camp another night. But as we pulled into a park so we could use the clean and pleasant smelling public restroom (heavy sarcasm), a unanimous decision is made. We are going to eat warm food, purchase cool gear at the gift shop, watch the free Yosemite video (not that cool BTW) and we are out of here. And so we did.

Some of the books Parm in particular liked at the visitors center

Before I move on, we were all in agreement that Yosemite was the park we would go back to at some point in our lives. There is a ton of infrastructure within the park, and lots of different things to see and do. In some ways, it felt the most majestic. It has an aire of mystery. Gold star for Yosemite :)

Evacuation is our only option; the pavement we pound

We are fortunate to have a friend from work, Mike Spiegel who lives in San Mateo just south of San Fran with his wife Libby, who agreed to take us in for a night. The drive there was uneventful with the exception of a large crack that appeared in Parm's windshield. Poor Snoop! Luckily we called Safelite and were able to get it fixed the next morning and have insurance cover it as a result of some good advice from Jose, our new favorite mechanic. Thanks Jose.

The stache contains magical knowledge of insurance policies.

Spiegel and Libby introduced us to their awesome dog Mason. They have a very cute house with a great backyard patio and we sampled the carrots and apples that they grow. Libby also made us some AMAZING tofu stirfry with chinese noodles for dinner and we ate some brownie batter for old times sake. My favorite part, other than hanging with Libby and Spiegel, was when we put Mason in a green snuggie.

It's a blanket...WITH SLEEVES

Animal cruelty? Maybe. But he looked so cute! Oh and we also loved that Speigel has our blog bookmarked. Gold Star for Speigel.

Such a cute dog!

Libby and Spiegel's masterful creation

Spiegel also got up early to make us some delicious breakfast sandwiches in the morning that I forgot in my initial post. Thank you Spiegs! They were BOMB.

Huge shout-out to Libby, Spiegel and Mason! Thank you for putting us up. I hope that you all get to watch Homeward Bound soon. And Libby if you get that career as a physician consultant for Women's Health, let me know.

Santa Barbara and LA are next...and this officially makes it a month on the road!